Penthouse to Outhouse - Week 14

Mental and physical toughness were the stories from this past week. And yes,
something special is going on in Denver. Aaron Rodgers has attained
"Elvis" status and gets his own Penthouse floor (just like Elvis in Las
Vegas), so he doesn't qualify for a suite. Here are my Penthouse Sweets
and my Outhouse Stinkers for Week #14. Any other nominees?

Penthouse Sweets

(Suite 1A) TJ Yates - What started out as a rookie 3rd string job has since
turned into a fulltime pressure cooked responsibility. This week, TJ went on the
road against a good team (Bengals) in dire need of a win to enhance its playoff
chances. All this rookie did was go 26-44 for 300 yds while throwing 2 TDs, he also
contributed 36 yds rushing. But that isn't the big story, down 19-13 with a little over
2 minutes left in the game, Yates and his teammates were staring at 80 yds of turf
with no timeouts. TJ led his team down the field with his arm, his brain, and his
legs, throwing the game winning TD with just 2 seconds left on the clock.
This dramatic drive gave the Texans the division title and their first playoff trip in
their short history. Not bad for a 5th round rookie. Well done!!
(Suite 2A) “Big Ben” - Ben thought that he had broken his leg after being
sacked. He was led off of the field and taken into the locker room for
evaluation. A raucous stadium fell silent. Halftime came and went with everyone
wanting to know the severity of Ben's injury, and how long he would be out.
When the team came out of the tunnel, a limping QB came with them. The
physically and mentally tough QB gutted out a performance for the ages. Big Ben
went 8-12 for 178 yds in the 2nd half with a game clinching TD pass ... on one leg.
He took hits, shuffled around in the pocket, and made throws that had all of us
tipping our hat to him in respect. This is one tough dude!!
(Suite 3A) Eli Manning - In a must win divisional game ... Eli was superb.
Just when you thought that the Giants were down & out, Eli rescues
this team, and now they control their own destiny for the divisional
title. Down by 12 late in the 4th qtr, Eli rallied his team to 2 TDs and a 2 point
conversion, putting his team ahead by 3, which they held onto for a dramatic
37-34 win at Dallas. Eli went 27-47, throwing for 400 yds and 2 TDs. I said it
earlier in the season, I would vote him MVP if it weren't for Aaron Rodgers!
(Suite 4A) Jason Pierre-Paul - What a monster game this young man had!!
All he did was lead his team in tackles, record 2 sacks (1 leading to a safety),
force a fumble that the Giants turned into a TD, and finally, block the game tying
FG attempt of the Cowboys. A stay in the Suites is well deserved!!!
(Suite 5A) The "Gronk" - What a beast!! Last weeks weekend stay wasn't long
enough for him, so he goes out and catches 6 balls for 160 yds with 2 more TD's
(setting the NFL record for most TD catches in a single season). His catch and
bulldozing style run on the sidelines was sensational. I'm glad I don't have to cover
or tackle him. Best TE in the game in only his 2nd year. WOW is the word when
describing the "Gronk". Teams are getting Tebow-ed ... players are getting Gronk-ed.
(Special Weekend Stay Suite) Maurice Jones Drew – On a bad team, MJD
stood out. While rushing and receiving for 136 total yards, MJD scored 4 TD’s in
carrying his team to a 41-14 blowout win. Gotta give some love to the NFLs leading
rusher, he deserves it.
(Divine Intervention Suite) Denver Broncos Team – This stay has
no limits. What the Denver Broncos team is doing is mesmerizing. Don’t try
to explain it … you can’t … believe me … I mean … Believe him!!!

Outhouse Stinkers

9. Jeff Triplette’s Officiating Crew – The personal foul call on London Fletcher’s
tackle on Tom Brady’s attempted late slide was infuriating (just ask London). Triplette
said that Fletcher hit Brady in the head when he didn’t even come close to it. It was a
clean tackle to the shoulder. Brady should have walked over to the flag, picked it up,
then, stuff it back into the officials pocket while saying … this is football, quit
screwing it up!! Come on guys … let football, be Football.
8. James Harrison – It wasn’t that it was late. It was a matter of another
shot to the head. If Harrison just hits him in the chest, everything would be fine.
7. Bears/Broncos First Half Offense – 60 total passing yards and 0 points
combined … Yuck. Fans who attend games that the Broncos play in, should just
remain out in the parking lot tailgating until the 4th qtr starts … they just need to
be there to see “Tebow time”. The rest of the game is ugly.
6. Cam Newton’s 2nd Half Picks – Cam can be spectacular, but he has to
learn how to corral his athleticism and talent when in a bad situation. Newton
made two bonehead decisions/throws in the 2nd half that killed Carolina’s
momentum and eventually got them beat. Carolina had a 23-7 lead over the
Falcons and had control of the game before Cam’s rookie mistakes.
5. Christian Ponder – Had his worst game of the season. He went 11-21
for only 115 yds while throwing 3 picks (1 for a pick 6). He also fumbled in the
end zone on his first play of the game giving the Lions an easy TD. Ponder was
benched in the 3rd qtr and replaced with Joe Webb who almost led the Vikings
to a come from behind win.
4. Bears Late Defensive Philosophy – After stymieing the Broncos for
55 minutes, the Bears defensive philosophy changed. Instead of playing aggressive
man coverage or pressuring Tebow, the Bears went to a soft zone mentality. I guess
they thought … I don’t know what they thought. By rushing four and playing soft zones,
the Bears allowed Tebow to dink and dunk his way down the field. A four man rush
also gave him room to move around in the pocket, as well as, get out of the pocket.
If a QB isn’t that accurate, wouldn’t you want him to have to make quick throws to
tightly covered receivers or have to make hot throws?
3. Raiders Road Show – After being blown out last week in Miami 34-14,
the Raiders laid another stinker getting blown out in Green Bay 46-16. This team
is playing bad football, and it doesn’t resemble a playoff team by any means. Another
year missing the playoffs.
2. TB Buccaneers Team – Losing 41-14 to the Jaguars … Are you kidding me?
Too many players on this team have quit, and that doesn’t bode well for HC
Raheem Morris. Changes are a coming.
1. Marion Barber – How can a veteran RB go out of bounds in that situation?
If he falls down in bounds … they win the game. Then in overtime, he fumbles the
ball away with his team already in FG position, giving the Broncos another shot at
“Tebow Time”. Not a good ending for Marion and the Bears.

* The Colts and Rams have attained permanent residency in the basement outhouse. They’ll need an act of congress to get them out.