• NFL to Replace Replacement Refs With Robot Refs That Look Like Yul Brenner

    Due to stalled negotiations with locked out officials and replacement officials being described as 'generally sucky', the NFL has turned to a high solution, robots. The animatronic referees are equipped with 150x zoom lens eyes, lazer guided penalty flags and specialized circuitry that will make sure that they only shoot each other, never players or spectators.

    "What could possibly go wrong?" - Roger Goodell, from a bunker beneath New York City.
    Richard Benjamin was unavailable for comment.