• Zone Blitz: Steel Crazy, The Upside-Down AFC East, and Your NFL Week 2 Open Thread. Oh- and Tony Romo.




    The Zone Blitz is a weekly article focusing on transitioning us from the week that was to the week that will be. Each week, fellow FPer mikesteelnation1 and I will discuss all relevant topics for the week, and may break off into a tangent or two along the way. Please feel free to use the open thread below to comment on the article, or to add any of your own unique thoughts on the coming week in the NFL.

    Hey Mike,

    Week 1 is (mostly) in the books as I write this, and unlike last year, we are both actually cheering for a 1-0 team. So no matter what direction this conversation goes, that fact alone has to be deemed a positive, especially since the other teams in the AFC North are essentially crumbling around the Steelers.


    The Good-

    BW: Offense, offense, offense. The 1st half featured a Steeler offense unlike anything I've ever seen from them. Against a very good defense in Cleveland, Roethlisberger looked as in command as I can remember seeing him, Brown and Wheaton made some explosive plays, and Justin Brown may be emerging as a fairly reliable 3rd down threat, with some actual size that could aid him in the red zone. But let's be honest, for all of the positive vibes from the passing game, it was the performance of the OL and especially Le'Veon Bell that stood out. Bell looked like a slightly bigger, more explosive version of Matt Forte. I'm not sure what was in his weed, but he looked like the next coming of a bonafide star yesterday, and if he can keep up some semblance of that performance, the Steelers offense may be next to unstoppable. Kudos have to go to Mike Munchak, as Bell had some actual holes to run through, but when hitting the open field, I'm not sure I can remember seeing a back in the black and gold quite as dynamic as Bell looked yesterday. Willie Parker was faster, but Bell has enough top-end speed, along with some real power, and a good little herky-jerk to his game.

    Oh, and Chong Blount's TD run may have been my favorite Steelers running play since the Bus posterized Urlacher a decade ago.

    MS: Bell looks like a legitimate stud. Over 200 all purpose yards vs a very good Browns D. The line looked very good in some situations, but that was somewhat of a mirage. They were horrible in pass pro, and terribad in situational short yardage run situations. The line singlehandedly was the reason the offense sucked in the second half (well that and Tomlin going SUPER CONSERATIVE). Bell and Ben stood out. Ben made more than one pretty long pass under duress doing what he does best, and then you can add in the audible he called to get Wheaton that ball to set up the game winning FG.

    On a side note, what the HELL were Bell and Blount thinking??? Not only were they breaking Rich's #1 rule of NEVER taking the weed out of the house, these dumbasses did this in ROSS FREAKING TOWNSHIP!!!!! Anyone who's from Pittsburgh knows exactly what I mean saying that... IDIOTS!!!!

    BW: {What, you don't think floating down McKnight Rd in a cloud is a wise decision?}

    MS: I fully expect our offense to carry the day for us on Thursday night....... our D isn't up to that challenge yet... that brings up the.....


    The Bad-

    BW: I was expecting much more from the defense. Even in the first half, it was more Cleveland looking shell-shocked than it was the Steelers defense making a difference. Then, once the second half hit, they clearly lost whatever bite they had. The run defense was abysmal all game. For most of the game, the Browns were down to 2 rookies in their first career action, and yet we allowed them over 6 YPC, and had absolutely no chance on the two TD runs by Crowell.

    The Browns absolutely deserve some credit as well. Their offensive line looked dominant, despite allowing 3 sacks. And Hoyer completely rebounded following a first half that, quite frankly, should have led to a Manziel sighting to start the 2nd half. I think they found themselves a real HC in Mike Pettine, and that they nearly pulled off the comeback without their two best offensive weapons on the field in the 2nd half in Tate and Jordan Cameron. Yet, that also points to some more Steeler weaknesses. They compounded their lack of run defense by not covering very well in the 2nd half. There were a lot of wide-butt-open receivers that Brian Hoyer was throwing to, and while the improved pass rush was a welcome site, we're still missing those explosive plays on defense that are supposed to thwart comebacks like the Browns had put together.

    I'll let you add your Steeler thoughts from here, but this is a league-wide site, so I should probably move on.

    MS: I'll be as brief as I can about our Steelers and move along, but WOW I have a super difficult time with the critiques of our D without taking into account a few HUGE factors.

    1. Our team is SOOOO YOUNG!!!!! We have EXACTLY one member of the front 7 that has over 16 starts in Lebeau's defense. Of those 7 we have a rookie ILB, a 2nd yr OLB, and a new to us DE. Add to that our back end features a brand new to us FS. We're super young and new on D. That's going to lead to growing pains, especially in THIS defense. The Lebeau ZB is predicated on everyone in it knowing what everyone else is **supposed** to be doing. Please see the '05 or '08 teams to see what I mean.

    2. I will take very little from the first 2 games as to the ceiling of our team. Most teams that have a Thursday away game will do a "2 week install" from a game plan perspective. We definitely did that this time around. We were so vanilla vs Cleveland scheme wise. We didn't plan around them. We went vanilla and saved the wrinkles for Baltimore on Thursday. Did we guess right about what to scheme for Bmore? I hope we did....

    This D needs some seasoning and to be evaluated in a normal game plan environment, not in the vacuum of being brand new AND faced with a 2 week install. Let's not expect too much too soon from this D. Ben and the offense are good enough to carry them for a minute...

    BW: Very fair point. The fact that there's growth potential in this defense excites me, but they had no shot against that Browns OL.


    Thursday Night Lookback- Champs play like the Champs

    BW: For some reason, I thought the Pack would go into Seattle and be able to assert some offensive dominance, and just enough defense to beat Seattle and establish themselves as the early favorite in the NFC.

    I was way off.

    I felt that the Packers offensive gameplan was questionable at best, and downright dreadful at worst. It's one thing to decide not to challenge an elite CB like Richard Sherman, but to make it actively obvious that you were not going to challenge him was one of the most foolish things I can ever remember seeing on the football field. For a big/physical DB like Sherman, one of the best ways to combat him is to line up a smallish, quicker receiver opposite him. The Packers have exactly that guy in Randall Cobb, who I thought was underutilized. They also have Jordy Nelson that they can line up opposite Sherman, even if for nothing more than 5-8 plays, and he is nothing more than a 3rd/4th option. But just to keep the Seahawk defense a tiny bit honest, you have to throw the ball his way at least 2 or 3 times.

    Instead, they decided to line Jarrett Boykin up opposite Sherman the entire game, and completely ignored that side of the field. It wasn't the Seahawks who completely cut the field in half, it was the Packers who did that to themselves. Suddenly, the deep game is completely gone, the run game isn't going anywhere (even before Lacy went out with a concussion), and they left themselves with a higher-risk dink and dunk game with little opportunity for yards after the catch. I've always thought that Aaron Rodgers has bailed out Mike McCarthy as a playcaller in the past, but this game kind of affirmed my thoughts that McCarthy is generally overrated as a HC.

    Of course, all of that is unfair to Seattle, who was dominant. What shocked me was how they were able to completely impose their will on offense, with some added explosiveness as long as Percy Harvin is healthy. Of course he won't play all 16, but if he can give them 12, and somehow be on the field come playoff time, they'll remain the favorites throughout the year.

    MS: The pack looked super foolish Thursday night. They got pushed around in nearly every facet of the game, and as you said, that directly gets tied back to the HC. Mccarthy crapped the bed in every way, shape and form. They should also attempt to teach their defense to tackle. Good god they can't tackle. When you can't tackle and you only attempt to throw at half the field on offense with no run game, it usually doesn't end well. Kudos to Seattle for showing up to defend their title, but they shouldn't crown themselves again based on what GB did....


    Sunday Surprises, and Tony Romo

    BW: It is certainly a surprise that the AFC East features 3 teams that sport a 1-0 record following week 1. It is downright shocking that the only team to not win was New England. I'm not saying that we should be stunned that the Pats lost, even though it's their first opening game loss since 2003, the year they famously released Lawyer Milloy just prior to the start of the season, but the way that they lost was stunning. I had a chance to catch the game today on NFL rewind, and the Patriots look like a team that lacks any type of explosion. For all the talk about Brady-Gronk, their best weapon right now is Shane Vereen, but they were unable to get him rolling, and he ended up with only 71 yards on 12 touches. If they can find ways to free him open, then maybe I'll buy into their offense, but they were in dink and dunk mode all game, mainly due to the Dolphins complete dominance at the LOS, and as the game wore on, the Dolphin defenders realized that Julian Edelman, KenBrell Thompkins, and the like weren't going to be beating them deep, and that Brady wasn't going to have the time necessary to allow plays to develop anyway. Being outscored 23-0 in the 2nd half against a middling team like Miami, especially when the defense was a top-priority in the offseason, and built to help sustain leads in the 2nd halves of games, is embarrassing. I think it's very possible we're looking at the beginning of the end for the Brady-led Patriots.

    However, it's not Miami that I think poses the biggest threat to take over New England's spot atop the AFC East. Say hello to Buffalo, who pulled off a HUGE road win in Chicago. The Bills have legit talent across the board, and despite allowing over 400 yards to one of the elite offenses in the league, the defense showed that they will continue to play well and make plays despite the losses of DC Mike Pettine and S Jairus Byrd.

    On offense, I've always felt that the news leaks that the staff was down on CJ Spiller was overblown. Dude avg 4.6 YPC last year, and nearly gained 1000 yards on a bum ankle, following a season where he put up 6.0 and over 1200. In the two games last year where he had 2 weeks rest going in, he put up 116 on 9.67 YPC against KC, and 149 on 9.93 YPC against Atl. Spiller enters this season fully healthy, and while yesterday was not his most explosive performance, there was a discernible reason as to why his numbers dipped last year, and I expect him to reclaim his role as one of the most explosive offensive weapons in the entire league.

    But it's not just him. Robert Woods looked fantastic, Fred Jackson is ageless, and Sammy Watkins is likely to turn into a star. None of that means anything without a QB to get them the ball, but I thought EJ Manuel looked pretty confident, and played really well. The Bears defense is a shell of what it once was, but if Manuel can continue to be competent--and I think he is more than capable of developing into a quality QB-- the Bills just may have the most talent in the AFC East.

    Oh, and Tony Romo.

    MS: Obviously it was surprising that Buffalo and Miami won Sunday. More surprising that Miami did, IMO. However with it being opening week, and knowing that Tannehill and whoever is Buffalo's current QB (I honestly stopped caring because they all sucked a while ago) are who they are, I have no fear that Brady and Darth Hoodie figure out how to cobble together a good enough offense to beat such weak QB's.

    Tony Romo was in his MOST epic ROMOEIST form this week... 3 picks in the first half?? 2 of which were among the worst throws possible... Tony decided to bring the 4th quarter to all 4 quarters! Perhaps its a merchandising plan Jerrah dreamed up. Make the other teams fans buy tickets to come to jerryworld. It sure worked week one....

    Ill add this- the Saints D looked to regress quite a bit. Like their top 10 finish was a mirage. Also, Drew Brees looks to have an even weaker arm. He underthrew more than normal.

    BW: If I may add one more thing, since we haven't yet touched on SNF. I know that the Colts made a late comeback to make the game look respectable, but the talent disparity between the Broncos and Colts was shocking. Because the Broncos feature Peyton Manning, it's easy to forget exactly how much talent that team has all over the place. I feel like the switch to Montee Ball over Knowshon Moreno is a net positive. The OL is also now healthy, and dominant. And while the Colts did a good job holding Demaryius Thomas to his worst performance in two years, I can't believe how explosive Emmanuel Sanders looks. I don't remember him looking that good at any point in Pittsburgh. In fact, I thought Markus Wheaton looked more explosive on Sunday than I ever remember from Sanders. But it is clear that Sanders is a perfect fit for an offense that, if they were missing anything last year, it was a shiftiness/quickness that the Sanders addition immediately addresses. And none of that mentions a defense that clearly has more talent than last year. It's easy to want to find a new answer in the AFC, especially after last year's disappointing Super Bowl performance, but there's still a big gap between Denver and everyone else.


    Ray Rice

    MS: Been lots of talk about Ray Rice and his situation. I'll be brief. He's probably never playing NFL football ever again. He was a marginal talent at this point in his career. The only reason his team kept him around was because they were cap poor on his deal and were throwing a Hail Mary he would return to the same form from 2 years ago. They cut him... he's done. By the next time he CAN play he will be a RB on the wrong side of 30 who's 2 yrs divorced from an actual productive season. Add to that the visceral reaction to seeing the video of what he did. I can't get that out of my head, and neither will any NFL owner given his ability.

    BW: I'll simply say ditto. While I am all for retribution and second chances, I'm not sure I want to give any more attention at this point to a guy who would do that to a woman. So let's move on...


    Week 2- The Lookahead

    MS: The matchups I'm most looking forward to this week are the following:

    Steelers/Ravens- We all know this game is going to be super physical. The better offense wins. Ben leads the no huddle to a late game win.

    Saints/Browns- This game is entertaining because its outside, and I think the Browns are better than most believe and the Saints worse than most believe. I also understand I could be completely wrong because I have such strong feelings about these teams for my own reasons. I pray the browns win!!

    Fins/Bills- Did last week happen??? If so, this game would signify who from the division would be best positioned to win it other than the Pats.... Does watkins and company break out? Or does wake keep destroying QB's? My bet is on the Fins...

    Pats/Viqueens- Who was actually the mirage? Do the pats suck? Are the queens an offensive juggernaught? I'm guessing the rams were that bad and the Dolphins are better than we suspect... Hard fought game the pats win by 3.

    Falcons/Bengals- Could be a fun game. Both teams seem to be GREAT at field goals!!

    Colts/Iggles- Good god, ESPN got a gift here. Most Monday games have been less than great, This one seems great. Up tempo Kelly offense. The Colts have Luck. Both teams seem to be stagnant until they're getting their ass kicked. Please refer to what both teams did last week. Colts down 24-0, Iggles down 17-0. This is going to be a 4th quarter Emmy winner... I really cant wait for the second half of this game...

    What are you feelings on week 2? What are your most interesting match ups?

    BW: Obviously the Steelers-Ravens game stands out to start the week. Unlike in years' past, I expect this game to be a bit of a shootout. Ben looked so good on Sunday, and frankly, the Ravens defense in its current state is a step down from what the Browns bring to the table. I just don't want to see the Steelers take the foot off the gas. Big games for Ben, Le'Veon, AB, and despite some offensive success on the other side of the ball for the Ravens, the Steelers win going away.

    For trainwreck purposes, I'll be keeping my eye on St. Louis and Tampa. Each of these teams seemed to have some sleeper potential, but I'm not sure there are two teams who looked more disappointing in week 1. In case the past 5 years or so haven't proven this already, Brian Schottenheimer has absolutely no clue what he's doing, and how he continues to hold a prominent job with an NFL club is inexplicable. Yes, I know they're down to someone named Austin Davis at QB, but I don't care the score, giving Bennie Cunningham more touches than Zac Stacy is a joke. On the other side, for all of the Bucs additions, the OL still can't get out of its own way. Doug Martin was ineffective before getting hurt, and despite the Bucs believing that the past decade has been a mirage, Josh McCown is not a legit NFL starting-caliber QB. That said, I do think their defense is legit, and Lovie is great at getting the most out of his teams, so I think the Bucs will find themselves at 1-1 by the end of the weekend.

    You're 100% right on Philly-Indy. It should be a shootout of the highest proportions, although it may take a little while to get going. I'm expecting that Pep Hamilton and Chuck Pagano are going to try and slow the game down early for some reason, but we may end up seeing a 90-100 play 2nd half. The Colts are the more desperate team, and are at home, so I'll take the Colts by a FG.

    I'll end with the NFC South invading Ohio. I have no ingrained hatred of the Saints, but you are correct that Brees showed some unexpected shakiness. Of course, some of that could be attributed to lingering effects of an oblique issue from training camp, and I do like what I'm seeing from Mark Ingram. I think the Saints find success on the ground, and Brees does enough in the air to allow the Saints to squeeze by the Browns. In Cincy, the Bengals seem to be disintegrating, while the Falcons looked scary good on offense last week. However, the Bengal defense is still solid, and the Falcons are a little too one-dimensional for my liking. Plus, their defense is terrible, and will have no shot at slowing down Gio Bernard or AJ Green. The Bengals will take down the Falcons.


    Now, it's your turn

    FP Nation- You've read through our thoughts, now the floor is yours. Please feel free to comment on any/all of what we've discussed above, and anything else that comes to your mind regarding week 2. Below is your official week 2 open thread, and that thread is now officially open for business.

    Comments 27 Comments
    1. Patrick Sullivan's Avatar
      Nice work, fellas.

      I gotta say it really bugs me that, on the anniversary of one of the worst days on our nation's history, CBS has made nothing more than a nominal mention of 9/11 instead focusing on the situation with Ray Rice & the Fraudger.
    1. Hoser's Avatar
      Man...the Ravens beat Steelers so bad I thought they were playing the game in an elevator.

      Too soon?
    1. hobbes27's Avatar
      Quote Originally Posted by Patrick Sullivan View Post
      Nice work, fellas.

      I gotta say it really bugs me that, on the anniversary of one of the worst days on our nation's history, CBS has made nothing more than a nominal mention of 9/11 instead focusing on the situation with Ray Rice & the Fraudger.
      Yeah I would agree with this. The problem is, the NFL mismanagement of this whole Ray Rice situation is a train wreck of epic proportions. So like most car wrecks we see on the side of the road, its hard not to have your attention drawn to something else.
    1. Brian Williams's Avatar
      The beginning of the coverage was appalling. My kid is finally getting into football, and I had to turn off the pregame and turn on Wheel of Fortune to keep him happy. I get the need to mention it, but to soapbox the entire pregame, including multiple showings of the video (the reason I changed the channel in the first place, ultimately for good) was disgusting. I get that I have a choice with my kids, and I made it, but CBS should not have put us in that position, not for the kids, but simply because it's wrong to continue showing that footage.

      Of course they were going to hit on it, but they way they went about it really turned me off.
    1. Brian Williams's Avatar
      Oh, and that game was about as big a butt-whuppin' as I can remember. Embarrassing.
    1. Patrick Sullivan's Avatar
      Quote Originally Posted by Hoser View Post
      Man...the Ravens beat Steelers so bad I thought they were playing the game in an elevator.

      Too soon?
      Nope. Good one.

      Of course, that game was so boring and the constant Rice yammering was so unbearable that I fell asleep in my recliner. Boring ass TNF debut, CBS.
    1. Patrick Sullivan's Avatar
      Wow. Microsoft paid $400 million to become the NFL's partner in making games "more interactive". Part of that package? Players and coaches using Microsoft Surface Tablets on the sidelines. The problem? Game announcers are calling the tablets iPads thus giving huge exposure to a Microsoft rival.

      Hah.
    1. Rich Gapinski's Avatar
      I am glad that I didn't get home from work until after 8 last night. It would have infuriated me.
    1. Patrick Sullivan's Avatar
      I will say that Kubiak - as a bad a HC as he was - is a pretty damn good OC. As it develops, that offense could be pretty solid.
    1. Rich Gapinski's Avatar
      Quote Originally Posted by Patrick Sullivan View Post
      I will say that Kubiak - as a bad a HC as he was - is a pretty damn good OC. As it develops, that offense could be pretty solid.
      I had a hard time with the Ravens in my predictions. I could absolutely see them being completely switched with what I have the Steelers doing this season. Kubiak would be a reason for that.
    1. Brian Williams's Avatar
      Quote Originally Posted by Rich Gapinski View Post

      I had a hard time with the Ravens in my predictions. I could absolutely see them being completely switched with what I have the Steelers doing this season. Kubiak would be a reason for that.
      A big reason was stated (smartly) by Simms on the telecast last night. They missed Anquan Boldin's presence at WR last year. Now, they have Steve Smith filling that role. His presence makes a huge impact on their offense, and gives them that toughness they had been lacking.

      Very impressive performance by the Ravens last night.
    1. Bengals1181's Avatar
      ha, Cris Carter telling a fun story right now:

      his real name is "Gradual Christopher Carter"


      In 7th grade, he starting going by "Cris" without the H, because Cris Collinsworth was his favorite player and because he didn't think he could ever become famous with a name like "Gradual" (which was his grandfather's name).
    1. Amy's Avatar
      Quote Originally Posted by Brian Williams View Post
      The beginning of the coverage was appalling. My kid is finally getting into football, and I had to turn off the pregame and turn on Wheel of Fortune to keep him happy. I get the need to mention it, but to soapbox the entire pregame, including multiple showings of the video (the reason I changed the channel in the first place, ultimately for good) was disgusting. I get that I have a choice with my kids, and I made it, but CBS should not have put us in that position, not for the kids, but simply because it's wrong to continue showing that footage.

      Of course they were going to hit on it, but they way they went about it really turned me off.
      I skipped the entire game. I was iffy on it anyway - and I *love* Steelers/Ravens games - based on not wanting to hear Simms talk about Rice for half the game. Then I found out they were killing the pregame show and the intro song, and I didn't even bother to turn it on.

      It just reinforces my all too commonly commented belief that Sports Show Producers/Directors really have no clue what fans actually want to see. Let sports news shows handle the news, let the broadcast teams do the game and nothing else.
    1. Patrick Sullivan's Avatar
      No, Adrian...

      Adrian Peterson has been indicted for reckless or negligent injury to a child. The report says he used a switch on one of his sons.

      http://www.nfl.com/news/story/0ap300...ld-injury-case
    1. Hoser's Avatar
      Quote Originally Posted by Patrick Sullivan View Post
      The report says he used a switch on one of his sons.

      http://www.nfl.com/news/story/0ap300...ld-injury-case
      Is that illegal? It kinda sorta seems like it should be. I dunno.

      The Bears make me nervous. Brock's toe makes me nervous. Culliver's head makes me nervous. The cakewalk through Dallas makes me nervous. The OT loss at home to the Bills makes me nervous. The fact that Trestman suddenly seems competent when he was totally incompetent as the Niner OC makes me nervous.
      I'm hoping for an ugly, grind it out defensive game with a heavy dose of Gore and Hyde.
    1. Rich Gapinski's Avatar
      The Whole Week in the NFL. Rice, Goodell, More:

      http://footballpros.com/blog.php
    1. Nancy's Avatar
      In Cincy, the Bengals seem to be disintegrating
      Truckload of injuries for the Bengals, it's true. But they do have some depth, so I don't think the wounds are mortal at this point.
      Looking forward to the Falcons game, which I probably won't see, but I expect the offense to be more productive in scoring situations; the problems in the red zone last week were, I think, an anomaly--they always have a tough time against the Ravens. The Bengals beating Atlanta would be a win-win for me, obviously!

      I look for the Panthers to have some (ok, lots of) issues this week, mainly because Matthew Stafford is not Josh McGown, and because Cam Newton can't stop poking the friggin' bear.

      BW: If I may add one more thing, since we haven't yet touched on SNF. I know that the Colts made a late comeback to make the game look respectable, but the talent disparity between the Broncos and Colts was shocking. Because the Broncos feature Peyton Manning, it's easy to forget exactly how much talent that team has all over the place. I feel like the switch to Montee Ball over Knowshon Moreno is a net positive. The OL is also now healthy, and dominant. And while the Colts did a good job holding Demaryius Thomas to his worst performance in two years, I can't believe how explosive Emmanuel Sanders looks. I don't remember him looking that good at any point in Pittsburgh. In fact, I thought Markus Wheaton looked more explosive on Sunday than I ever remember from Sanders. But it is clear that Sanders is a perfect fit for an offense that, if they were missing anything last year, it was a shiftiness/quickness that the Sanders addition immediately addresses. And none of that mentions a defense that clearly has more talent than last year. It's easy to want to find a new answer in the AFC, especially after last year's disappointing Super Bowl performance, but there's still a big gap between Denver and everyone else.
      I agree, Brian. The Broncos looked light years better than Indy. And Emmanuel Lewis? Holy hell! Explosive is right. Yet, the Colts did what the Colts do and damn near beat a clearly superior team, though the Broncos appeared to be kind of dozing through the second half...I think Foxy was kind of sitting on that lead....he must have forgotten that Andrew Luck is magical
    1. edave's Avatar
      Quote Originally Posted by Hoser View Post
      Is that illegal? It kinda sorta seems like it should be. I dunno.
      Corporal punishment is still pretty big in the south. Whenever I hear about someone using a switch to discipline a child I think back to Richard Pryor's description of the fear he got just getting the switch and bringing it back inside. I wasn't sure I'd find it, but YouTube delivers.

      Go get something so I can beat yo ...
    1. Nancy's Avatar
      Corporal punishment is still pretty big in the south.
      Yes, because we're all barefoot and ignorant. Nobody beats their kids up north anymore.

      However, you make up for the broad and unfair generalization with the Richard Pryor (who grew up in Illinois, by the way) clip. Hilarious then, hilarious now. It takes a true genius to wring that kind of humor out of egregious pain, neglect and abuse.
    1. Patrick Sullivan's Avatar
      Quote Originally Posted by Nancy View Post
      Yes, because we're all barefoot and ignorant. Nobody beats their kids up north anymore.

      However, you make up for the broad and unfair generalization with the Richard Pryor (who grew up in Illinois, by the way) clip. Hilarious then, hilarious now. It takes a true genius to wring that kind of humor out of egregious pain, neglect and abuse.
      From Wiki:

      Born in Peoria, Illinois, Pryor grew up in his grandmother's brothel, where his mother, Gertrude L. (Thomas), practiced prostitution.[23] His father, LeRoy "Buck Carter" Pryor (June 7, 1915 – September 27, 1968) was a former boxer and hustler.[24] After his mother abandoned him when he was 10, he was raised primarily by his grandmother Marie Carter,[25] a violent woman who would beat him for any of his eccentricities.[26] Pryor was one of four children raised in his grandmother's brothel, and was sexually abused at age 7.
      What a life. The fact he could find humor in it is both sad and amazing. No wonder he was such a mess...

      BTW - AP's case is in Texas. Not exactly part of "the South". Oh. And there is this:

      More via Sports Radio 610: Peterson allegedly told the child's mother via text message that he “felt bad after the fact when I notice the switch was wrapping around hitting I (sic) thigh.” Peterson also acknowledged the injury to the child's scrotum, saying in the text message, “Got him in nuts once I noticed. But I felt so bad, I'm all tearing that butt up when needed! I start putting them in timeout. N save the whooping for needed memories!

      "“Never do I go overboard!" Peterson continued. "But all my kids will know, hey daddy has the biggie heart but don't play no games when it comes to acting right.”

      Meanwhile, police reports tell a different story. Again, details courtesy of Sports Radio 610:

      According to police reports, the child, however, had a slightly different story, telling authorities that “Daddy Peterson hit me on my face.” The child also expressed worry that Peterson would punch him in the face if the child reported the incident to authorities. He also said that he had been hit by a belt and that “there are a lot of belts in Daddy's closet.” He added that Peterson put leaves in his mouth when he was being hit with the switch while his pants were down. The child told his mother that Peterson “likes belts and switches” and “has a whooping room.”
      Jesus. WTF is this? 1890?

      More: from http://houston.cbslocal.com/2014/09/...tment-charges/

      The “whooping” – as Peterson put it when interviewed by police – occurred in Spring, Texas, in May. Peterson’s son had pushed another one of Peterson’s children off of a motorbike video game. As punishment, Peterson grabbed a tree branch – which he consistently referred to as a “switch” – removed the leaves and struck the child repeatedly.
      The beating allegedly resulted in numerous injuries to the child, including cuts and bruises to the child’s back, buttocks, ankles, legs and scrotum, along with defensive wounds to the child’s hands. Peterson then texted the boy’s mother, saying that one wound in particular would make her “mad at me about his leg. I got kinda good wit the tail end of the switch.”

      Peterson also allegedly said via text message to the child’s mother that he “felt bad after the fact when I notice the switch was wrapping around hitting I (sic) thigh” and also acknowledged the injury to the child’s scrotum in a text message, saying, “Got him in nuts once I noticed. But I felt so bad, n I’m all tearing that butt up when needed! I start putting them in timeout. N save the whooping for needed memories!”

      In further text messages, Peterson allegedly said, “Never do I go overboard! But all my kids will know, hey daddy has the biggie heart but don’t play no games when it comes to acting right.”
      **** Adrian Peterson.