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Thread: You're Going To Laugh. Hard.

  1. #11
    Don't forget to carry on lots of already opened shampoo bottles.

  2. #12
    Bucks, make sure you go online and get your boarding pass & seat selection 24 hours before takeoff. Get an aisle seat (or an emergency row seat if they will let you).

    Have your ID & boarding pass on your person when you get to the airport.

    Wear shoes you can slip in & out of easily (I bought a little plastic shoehorn that lives in my carry-on bag just for this).

    Once you show your boarding pass and move into the line for the security scan, start putting your personal gear into your bag (phone, wallet, keys, watch, jewelry, etc.)

    Take off your jacket, belt & shoes and get them into a bin. Same for your laptop if you have one.

    All of the above should be done well before you get to the belt & scanner

    If you are looking for clues, find single people in business attire and follow their lead.

    Flying is a buzz raid.
    Screw you guys, I'm going home.

  3. #13
       
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    I'm guessing whether you're flying out of Cleveland, Cincy or Indy, the airport isn't going to be super busy. Nevertheless, especially as a rookie, I say you plan to be walking through the terminal doors one hour before departure. Give yourself time. And bring your patience, a traveler's greatest asset.

  4. #14
       
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    Don't watch the first Final Destination movie the night before you fly.

    Also, some airlines allow you to board anywhere. I suggest you find the hottest chick flying alone and sit next to her. =)

    Plus what everyone else said above. Especially carrying your luggage on rather than checking it. Waiting in baggage claim absolutely sucks, especially if your bag never makes it out of there. Yeah, that happened to me once..

  5. #15
       
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    Quote Originally Posted by mikesteelnation1 View Post
    Don't be "that guy" buckeye... "That guy" is the person who watches everyone else that flies regularly WATCH the people who regularly fly, do what's necessary to get thru security, but does nothing until he gets to the x ray conveyor belt about it.

    I fly at least 4 times a month, so here is what I mean. Put the contents of your pockets in your jacket or carry on. Take off your belt. Don't have any liquids over 3oz in your carry on. Have said jacket off BEFORE you get to the moving belt. Have your id and ticket in your hand. Take off ur shoes and put them in a bin. Put the bin and your stuff on the belt. Walk thru the metal detector sans anything on ur person but clothing. Collect your stuff and move on. Hopefully you won't be "selected for additional screening"

    I really wish the airports had 2 lines for security. Business travelers, and everyone else. I don't mean to sound snarky, but its maddening to wait in line 8+ times a month, when at least 5 ppl in line require 5 extra minutes after they get to the belt to get ready to go thru security after they have waited 30+ minutes to get there, and seen dozens of people go thru the routine, and not be in a position based on learned behavior to expedite the process.

    Also depending on flight time and layovers, plan out your hunger and entertainment. Eat before you leave, and bring ESPN the mag an sports illustrated. Or play angry birds and listen to music.. or watch a movie. Or get tossed in the airport and sleep thru the flight.
    Thanks for the heads up. I've already envisioned in my mind that it's gonna go as smooth as the veterans. The ONLY way the line is held up: is if a lady can't do the x-ray, security pad-down/cavity check! It's that or I'm calling the police.
    "This Game is Not For the Faint of Heart" --Bill Parcells

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  6. #16
       
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    Quote Originally Posted by Andy Freeland View Post
    My only advice is if you're flying alone take headphones. Flying might seem exotic, but really it's just boring. It's sitting still and staring straight ahead while surrounded by tightly packed strangers. Electronic gadgets are your friends. You can't use them during takeoff or landing, but have them ready as soon as you hear the first 'ding' (you may now use approved electronic devices). I suggest either an mp3 player and reading material or my personal favorite an ipad with a movie or tv show. Either of those should be sufficient to fight the true dangers of flying, boredom and a loud, boring person within earshot (why are the most boring people always the loudest?).

    And forget about safety. Your odds of being in a crash are 29.4 million to 1, that's once every 80,000 years if you flew every single day. Being in an airplane is much safer than being in your own home.
    Thanks Andy. I thought to myself that I'm gonna make sure I have a fresh battery in my MP3 so that I can play the whole way. I think it's best so that I can enjoy the scenes out the window. I'm sure we won't crash BUT I notice no one has mentioned the turbulance thus far! LOL
    "This Game is Not For the Faint of Heart" --Bill Parcells

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  7. #17
       
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    Quote Originally Posted by wxwax View Post
    I myself went through that once. I started fixating on it. Despite having flown since childhood. The brain is a bad, bad thing!

    Buckeye, you'll be fine as long as you keep your shampoo in a thimble wrapped in a plastic baggie. Oh, and don't check your luggage if you can help it. The wait at the other end is soul-destroying. Do carry-on with a proper-size bag. And make sure you're at the head of the line when they board your section, overhead space is at a premium.
    LOLOLOLOLOLOL Your Sky story was Awesome! LOLOLOLOL But Yeah; Good tip on the line. Thanks.
    "This Game is Not For the Faint of Heart" --Bill Parcells

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  8. #18
       
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    Quote Originally Posted by FrzzerBwler View Post
    Buckeye if you're not so lucky you'll get a plane that is not even made of metal. Composite stuff, thin layers glued together. Not sure if Super Glue is allowed in a carry on but you might want some in case of delamination under your seat.The old Scout motto; Be Prepared. If nothing else Tebow in the middle of the aisle. So where are you off too?
    LOL That Glue might be banned by TSA LOL. I'm goin' to Dallas! I'm siked. I want to try "Dickey's Barbecue Pit" in Terminal C.
    "This Game is Not For the Faint of Heart" --Bill Parcells

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  9. #19
       
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bengals1181 View Post
    Don't forget to carry on lots of already opened shampoo bottles.
    LOL We should Road Trip to the P & G plant & get some there!
    "This Game is Not For the Faint of Heart" --Bill Parcells

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  10. #20
       
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    Quote Originally Posted by GoBigOrGoHome View Post
    Bucks, make sure you go online and get your boarding pass & seat selection 24 hours before takeoff. Get an aisle seat (or an emergency row seat if they will let you).

    Have your ID & boarding pass on your person when you get to the airport.

    Wear shoes you can slip in & out of easily (I bought a little plastic shoehorn that lives in my carry-on bag just for this).

    Once you show your boarding pass and move into the line for the security scan, start putting your personal gear into your bag (phone, wallet, keys, watch, jewelry, etc.)

    Take off your jacket, belt & shoes and get them into a bin. Same for your laptop if you have one.

    All of the above should be done well before you get to the belt & scanner

    If you are looking for clues, find single people in business attire and follow their lead.

    Flying is a buzz raid.
    Thanks Man. My cell phone has little metal on it but I'm not taking any chances; I'll put it in the bin. I'm a germ-free Oholic but not on MON!
    "This Game is Not For the Faint of Heart" --Bill Parcells

    Facebook.com/BuckeyeRidley

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