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Thread: You're Going To Laugh. Hard.

  1. #1
       
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    Exclamation You're Going To Laugh. Hard.

    I've never flown on a plane before. My first time doing so will be on Monday. Im good on what to do including not screaming as we gradually take off & are in the air thousands of feet above the ground.

    What experiences did you have that you want to pass along to this Rookie of the Skys?
    "This Game is Not For the Faint of Heart" --Bill Parcells

    Facebook.com/BuckeyeRidley

  2. #2
       
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    Don't bother dressing before you board. Show up in jammies and flipflops cuz once they're done stripping you and all your valuables, it'll be faster. Eat beforehand cuz they no longer feed you. Forget having any elbow room. And no, no one will be able to meet your plane when you land. Have a ball, Buck. It ain't like it used to be. /sniff sniff/
    “Everybody counts or nobody does.” – Detective Harry Bosch

  3. #3
       
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    Quote Originally Posted by brauneyz View Post
    Don't bother dressing before you board. Show up in jammies and flipflops cuz once they're done stripping you and all your valuables, it'll be faster. Eat beforehand cuz they no longer feed you. Forget having any elbow room. And no, no one will be able to meet your plane when you land. Have a ball, Buck. It ain't like it used to be. /sniff sniff/
    LOL Thanks B! I thought of that too: "personal" space, paying for meals, security x-rays, Best Buy Express kiosks. Now THIS is a Party!
    "This Game is Not For the Faint of Heart" --Bill Parcells

    Facebook.com/BuckeyeRidley

  4. #4
       
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    Don't be "that guy" buckeye... "That guy" is the person who watches everyone else that flies regularly WATCH the people who regularly fly, do what's necessary to get thru security, but does nothing until he gets to the x ray conveyor belt about it.

    I fly at least 4 times a month, so here is what I mean. Put the contents of your pockets in your jacket or carry on. Take off your belt. Don't have any liquids over 3oz in your carry on. Have said jacket off BEFORE you get to the moving belt. Have your id and ticket in your hand. Take off ur shoes and put them in a bin. Put the bin and your stuff on the belt. Walk thru the metal detector sans anything on ur person but clothing. Collect your stuff and move on. Hopefully you won't be "selected for additional screening"

    I really wish the airports had 2 lines for security. Business travelers, and everyone else. I don't mean to sound snarky, but its maddening to wait in line 8+ times a month, when at least 5 ppl in line require 5 extra minutes after they get to the belt to get ready to go thru security after they have waited 30+ minutes to get there, and seen dozens of people go thru the routine, and not be in a position based on learned behavior to expedite the process.

    Also depending on flight time and layovers, plan out your hunger and entertainment. Eat before you leave, and bring ESPN the mag an sports illustrated. Or play angry birds and listen to music.. or watch a movie. Or get tossed in the airport and sleep thru the flight.
    Last edited by mikesteelnation1; 02-24-2012 at 02:46 AM.
    "If I could start my life all over again, I would be a professional football player, and you damn well better believe I would be a Pittsburgh Steeler." Jack Lambert, 1990 HoF Introduction.

  5. #5
    My only advice is if you're flying alone take headphones. Flying might seem exotic, but really it's just boring. It's sitting still and staring straight ahead while surrounded by tightly packed strangers. Electronic gadgets are your friends. You can't use them during takeoff or landing, but have them ready as soon as you hear the first 'ding' (you may now use approved electronic devices). I suggest either an mp3 player and reading material or my personal favorite an ipad with a movie or tv show. Either of those should be sufficient to fight the true dangers of flying, boredom and a loud, boring person within earshot (why are the most boring people always the loudest?).

    And forget about safety. Your odds of being in a crash are 29.4 million to 1, that's once every 80,000 years if you flew every single day. Being in an airplane is much safer than being in your own home.

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    podcasts, lots of podcasts.

    And I am going to suggest something very unusual and almost unheard of...

    strike up a conversation with your neighbor.

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    About 45 minutes after taking off, when your airplane has reached 30,000 feet, I want you to think hard.

    Think hard about what is beneath your feet.

    A very thin, lightweight sheet of aluminum is the only thing between you and a long, cold fall to your death.

    Go ahead, drum your feet on the cabin floor. Feel how it vibrates? They build those things so they don't weigh a lot. That means as little metal as possible. There's very little between you and the ground, which is a long, long way down.

    Happy travels!

  8. #8
    Quote Originally Posted by wxwax View Post
    About 45 minutes after taking off, when your airplane has reached 30,000 feet, I want you to think hard.

    Think hard about what is beneath your feet.

    A very thin, lightweight sheet of aluminum is the only thing between you and a long, cold fall to your death.

    Go ahead, drum your feet on the cabin floor. Feel how it vibrates? They build those things so they don't weigh a lot. That means as little metal as possible. There's very little between you and the ground, which is a long, long way down.

    Happy travels!
    That's just evil.

  9. #9
       
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    Quote Originally Posted by Andy Freeland View Post
    That's just evil.
    I myself went through that once. I started fixating on it. Despite having flown since childhood. The brain is a bad, bad thing!

    Buckeye, you'll be fine as long as you keep your shampoo in a thimble wrapped in a plastic baggie. Oh, and don't check your luggage if you can help it. The wait at the other end is soul-destroying. Do carry-on with a proper-size bag. And make sure you're at the head of the line when they board your section, overhead space is at a premium.
    Last edited by wxwax; 02-24-2012 at 03:08 PM.

  10. #10
       
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    Buckeye if you're not so lucky you'll get a plane that is not even made of metal. Composite stuff, thin layers glued together. Not sure if Super Glue is allowed in a carry on but you might want some in case of delamination under your seat.The old Scout motto; Be Prepared. If nothing else Tebow in the middle of the aisle. So where are you off too?
    Quote Originally Posted by wxwax View Post
    About 45 minutes after taking off, when your airplane has reached 30,000 feet, I want you to think hard.

    Think hard about what is beneath your feet.

    A very thin, lightweight sheet of aluminum is the only thing between you and a long, cold fall to your death.

    Go ahead, drum your feet on the cabin floor. Feel how it vibrates? They build those things so they don't weigh a lot. That means as little metal as possible. There's very little between you and the ground, which is a long, long way down.

    Happy travels!

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